Um… It Is My Money…

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icon Something I hate most is letting my mum borrow, well, use and spend my money. See, I let her borrow it, but the issue is that she never pays it back. She doesn’t even try. Then when I bring it up, she hands me her card and gets that little attitude and says “spend whatever”.

I mean, it’s just so rude and just completely nasty. She never says thank you for my letting her have my money either. Then when I get upset about her spending all my money, she gets pissy. In my opinion, she has no right to get angry or pissy or even have an attitude. Its my money, encase she forgot.

Then she tries to bring up all of the things she buys and does for me. I’m not trying to be mean, but that’s not what we agreed to. She chooses to buy those things for me. I never said that paid me back for the money I lent you.

I think the worst part about it is, that over the years, she has never even tried to pay it back. Instead, she gets an attitude about it. Like she’s entitled to my money. As of right now, she owes me almost three thousand dollars that she has never tried to pay back. At all. She doesn’t even bring it up and say she’s sorry for not paying me back or anything! like her owing me money is just “who cares?” and completely unimportant. :/

For the record, I’ve been loaning her money since my childhood. Birthday money? Yeah, she got pretty much all of it. Worst case was this year. I got a total of $90 from people at McDonald’s who we’ve become friends with in the past few months. These people are barely getting by or are just about homeless themselves. But they gave me money for my birthday to (as they say) “buy myself something nice”. So guess who got every penny of my birthday money? Mum did.

Today I wanted $10 from my birthday money and what does she do? Say no. :/ She always says she’ll pay me back and I get we’re fucking broke, but I want at least some of my money! It was given to me! I get we’re homeless, but I’ve helped a lot with it. I’ve given her all my money since we became like this and all I want is 10 fucking dollars.

Not to mention all of the fucking hard work I do. I have to organize our van nearly every day just to be able to sleep. For the record, this is a nearly 3 hour process, every day. I fix the bed, make the bed, find us food, organize, help wash the clothes, fold the clothes, get us free things whenever I can, give her every penny I have, and more! And I can’t even have $10 of my own money?!

After all this, she doesn’t get why I’m pissed or upset about my money. She gets this attitude that she has absolutely no right to have. I mean, I get she can’t pay it all at once, but just mentioning that she wants to pay me back once in a while would be nice. She won’t even bring it up, at all, but gets pissed when I do. sorry, but that just isn’t okay with me. It feels like she’s using me.

Right now, I’m thinking of taking up this job offer that I’m kind of interested in. The part that bothers me though is when I get said job and work hard, where will my money go? Oh yeah, to my fucking mother. As usual, I’ll do all the hard work and she’ll get all the money from it. I call that using somebody. Parents are supposed to support their kids, not the other way around. (Well, kids do support their parents when their parents are grandparent age! When they’re in nursing homes. My mum isn’t.)

I mean, if I wanted or was ready to support another human being, then I’d have a fucking kid. But I’m not, so I don’t. I want my money for myself and I don’t mind sharing some with her, but every fucking penny is just too much. Especially since she doesn’t appreciate it, at all. I give it to her and she doesn’t even say thank you or anything.

Like… whatever. It just pisses me off and she doesn’t care. She just cares about having some rude entitlement attitude. Sorry, but grow up. Sometimes my mother can act like a huge baby. She’s 60, not 6. She needs to think about that.

I don’t mind helping out, but I don’t want to be used or taken advantage of either. That’s where i draw the line.

5 thoughts on “Um… It Is My Money…”

  1. My mom did this to me with child support, my birthday money, everything. You should take the job if you have been offered it! You can use the money you make to open up a bank account, putting her on the paper for if anything happens to you (i.e. you die, become severely ill, etc.). You also don’t have to tell her about the bank account if you don’t wish to. However, taking this job would allow you to have some independence away from your mom, and you’d even be able to save up for an apartment (over time, of course). If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll have had some recent experience.

    Good luck!

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  2. i know how you feel love :( me and my boyfriend were living together and barely keeping afloat. i barely made any money at all but handed the checks over to pay for everything needed – every once in a while i would “want” something very little in price and given a no – making me feel like shit that another adult was withholding MY money. made me feel so angry and low. once i wanted to buy a card for a funeral, no money in it just a card but he saw the 2 bucks as something we needed and it still irks me! its hard when things are low – the wants become day dreams and nothing more. as for her needing to take everything you have – i can see your anger! in reguards to the finances, my thoughts are with you that the hardship starts to look up for you soon! <3 xoxo

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  3. Man that honestly sucks! I can see why you’re wanting the $10 after all it was your money that you have received on your birthday! That’s down right rude!

    This is the same situation with my dad. I called him up on Friday and asked him if I could possibly borrow $5 or $10 to get me by. All he said was that he’ll try to come by. He also said that he’ll try to get it over to me and he’ll call me later. When later came I got a reply from him on Facebook. How is that relevant to calling? Its not!

    So the whole weekend goes by, and had not even seen my dad. The last message I’ve gotten from him was that he just got done working (which he works with his ugly ass (sorry for cursing) girlfriend by doing antiques and what not). He also stated that he’ll try to come by on Sunday. Did he even show up or actually tell me why he didn’t? NOPE. I’m struggling as well as my boyfriend, and all we wanted was help. I didn’t get it from my dad or from my family. Thanks…instead I got help from my friend. Which I’m thankful for.

    But because I didn’t get any help and waited and waited for my dad to show up I cried and was totally stressed out all weekend and had seizures because of the stress. I’m tired of being nice and getting no where. I know that’s exactly what you’re thinking right about now with your mum. So in an essence, we are pretty much in the same boat.

    I do agree with Liza on this matter, if you have been offered a job – I would take it and open up your own bank account. If all else fails, and your mom does know about you having a job and her bumming money off you tell her flat out NO. You have your money, I have mine. This is my hard earned money. That’s what I would do. Good luck and again I do agree with Liza on this statement.

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  4. That’s such an interesting take on it! I’m Southeast Asian so my exposure has been different culturally. If my mom wanted money she NEVER has to pay it back, that’s the mindset we have. Pretty traditional, but it’s no biggy. But I can definitely see the struggle and distrust resulting in her lack of effort for even a thank you or some recognition.

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  5. My parents have always been nice about almost everything… and they put that habit in me of putting my money in the bank… in my own account…
    when I was small, the account was co-owned by my dad but he never ever withdrew money from it… and when we shifted and had to close down that account… he put all that money into my new account without taking a penny… My mom also, if she takes my money for change or something… sees to it that it’s replaced…

    I think you should put your money in the bank so that you atleast get interest on it… or take a job or something so that you can save up faster…

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